This is a breakup gone so horribly, horribly wrong.  Kind of hard to figure that something that went so well for more than 40 years has come to this.  But it has.  And now it needs to end.  She needs to go.

I hate to sound harsh, but the truth must be told.   I have no use for her anymore.  I’ve moved on.  I have new interests, new hobbies, new friends and she just doesn’t fit in anymore.   Beyond that, I’ve lost all trust in her.   She has disappointed me too many times what with overpromising and under-delivering particularly in this last decade of our time together.

After so many years of being a rock-steady constant in my life she has become increasingly erratic.  Showing up with her cronies unannounced, or embarrassingly late, and often blowing in like a hurricane, intimidating and bullying and disrupting everything.

All the while, my resentment simmered.

And don’t even get me started about what a financial drain she has been.  It was never any huge outlay of cash at one time, but over the years, when you add up all those purchases for her and about her…I shudder to think where my 401k might be now if I could have repurposed that money and just socked it away instead of spending it on HER!

I tried to end it.  I tried to do the humane thing and suggest we should split up “but still be friends”.  That was nothing but a coward’s lie.  I don’t want to be her friend.  I want her GONE!  Out of my life.  Forever!!!

And so it is with a heavy heart that I make this offer.

Free to good home: My uterus.  Heavy mileage, but regular maintenance performed.  Still runs (sort of).  Might make a good “starter” but not intended for any real serious tasks. Local delivery only.